By Irene Conlan -

Halloween is over. The little witches, ghosts, pirates and X-men have removed their costumes, counted their pieces of candy, ate much more than they should have and have drifted off into sweet dreams (pun intended). They will talk about it today and the memory will fade away quickly as talk turns to Thanksgiving,  Christmas and Hannakkah.  Christmas decorations are already boldly displayed in the stores and advertisments are playing on TV and the radio.” Buy, Buy, Buy” is the message.

For some of you, the holidays are something to look forward to. You love the hustle and bustle, the crowds in the store,the gift selections, the family gatherings, the religious significance – the whole nine yards. You are already planning the menu for Thanksgiving and can almost smell the turkey roasting in the oven. It is a tradition you love and look forward to each year. The same with Christmas. You may have already finished most of your Christmas shopping with the exception of a few small gifts and you may have the Christmas music loaded in your MP3 player. It is a time for you of wonderful memories that take you back to a childhood of “sugar plums” dancing in your head. It is a time of deep religious significance.

Some of you don’t feel positive about the holidays and this may be a very difficult time for you. Perhaps you don’t understand the significance of  Thanksgiving or have no money to buy food  on a daily basis. much less food for a feast -  turkey and all the trimmings. It is a hard time for people on a tight budget. Perhaps you have never experienced a bountiful Thanksgiving and don’t know what all the fuss is about. You many not celebrate Christmas because it is not a part of your belief system. Many dislike Christmas because their memories are of days of fighting and abuse, unhappiness and pain connected to this holiday.

Those who are bereaved have a hard time with all the holidays year around because the days evoke painful memories of times with the person who has died. Grief changes things. If you are in this group, start now to prepare yourself to cope. Two excellent online resource are  http://www.thegriefblog.com or http://www.opentohope.com.

Whether you love or hate the holidays, they are here – right in front of us. Regardless of where you stand on the celebrations, this is a great time to:

• Reflect on all you have to be grateful for. Spend time with this and do it right. We will be talking much more about gratitude and appreciation as we move closer to Thanksgiving. This is a very beneficial exercise and I don’t want you to miss out on its rewards.
• What do you believe? I mean what do you really believe? Take away what you accept because you were told you had to and get right down to the basics. What do you believe? Have you ever thought it through?
• How can you deal with the stress of the million things to do? Plan now on how you will get it all done.
• If money is tight, call a family gathering and decide how you will handle gift giving. What is the spending limit? Can you draw names this year or plan on hand made gifts? Or can you forgo gifts altogether and, as a family, contribute to those who are suffering in some way?
• What can you do to help someone else through the season?
• Don’t rain on someone else’s parade. If you hate the holidays, don’t spew it on everyone around you. Find something to be happy about and dwell on that.
• Put your on meaning on the holidays so you can enjoy a time of celebration along with everyone else.

Let me know your ideas about how to celebrate fully or simply cope and get through. Is it “‘Tis the season to be jolly?” or “Bah Humbug?”