By Irene Conlan -

Yesterday was spent getting things fixed and back in order after the lightening hit our house during Tuesday night’s storm.  We had a repairman from the cable company come to fix the digital phone. The charge from the lightening was so powerful that it blew the cover off the jack outlet for the phone and left the wires exposed. I found the cover broken and burned half way across the room under the couch.

When that was fixed, the phone still didn’t work – the phone base was “fried” and powerless. So now I have a very inexpensive phone (a.k.a. the cheapest phone I could buy) while the good phone is being replaced. (It’s one of those situations that requires me to return the phone to AT&T in exchange for a new one – it will take two or three weeks). The repairman also rewired the modem and router for the computers, reset the TV and got everything back up and running properly.

The damage wasn’t insurmountable but simply an inconvenience. I know I can manage without voice mail until I get my phone back. The only thing left to do is replace the halogen bulb in the floor lamp and mail the damaged phone to AT&T.

I normally would be at least a bit upset by it all but I am so grateful that no one was hurt and that the damage was minor that I just couldn’t get too rankled by it. My grandson was all excited about it and was bemoaning the fact that he missed it. He had me tell him about the pop and the sparks that flew several times and asked more questions than I could answer. For him it was a great experience and one he could tell his friends about.

So what’s the point of all this?

Life changes quickly sometimes. Sometimes the changes are small and can easily be taken in stride – like this incident with the lightening. It was easy to go about fixing the damage and finding the positives and even the humor in it. It has already become little more than a topic of conversation.

Sometimes an instant can change your life drastically – for the good or for the not-so-good. A car crash, a heart attack, a hurricane or tornado, loss of your job – these are life changing situations. Meeting your soul-mate, getting married, having a baby, finding a new job, buying a new house, moving – these are also  life changing situations but on the positive side. Both require adjustment and adaptation on your part. According to the Holmes and Rahe stress scale, some of the positive events in our life, such as marriage and starting a new job – are as stressful as some of the negative events. Major life changes require resilience and equanimity. (Note: You can see the Holmes and Rahe stress scale below in the Health category).

Resilience and equanimity come from:

• knowing who you are, what you want and what you believe
• knowing your strengths and weaknesses and knowing how to use them to your advantage (yes, you need to know how to deal with weaknesses just as much as you need to know how to use your strengths).
• having successful experiences dealing with change and learning from them
• having unsuccessful experiences dealing with change and learning from them
• having a network of friends and family who care and will help
• having in place some good stress management tools; e.g., relaxation techniques, regular meditation,  deep breathing exercises, etc.
• having an attitude of appreciation and gratitude

These are the basics and  each of us needs a different mix because we are unique individuals. All of this is work you do for yourself – perhaps with a mentor or coach now and then to help you stay on track.

To me, this is what self improvement is about – developing the tools to meet life’s challenges head-on with grace so you can enjoy as much happiness along the way as possible.

I hope your day is wonderful.