By Audrey Finch -

As the song says. “Regrets, I’ve had a few.” And I guess most of us can probably identify with that. I hope yours have been “too few to mention”. Perhaps the biggest mistake of all is to not learn the lessons from our mistakes. Mistakes can result from something we say or do. But maybe you feel that what you didn’t say or do was a bigger mistake. Perhaps you have made choices that turned out to be wrong and which resulted in an experience that you would rather not have had. Whatever the mistake, you’ve survived it – it is now woven into the fabric of you and has contributed to you being the person you are.

Mistakes are simply part of growing – remember, if you don’t make a mistake you don’t make anything. But are there ways we can survive our mistakes and not live a life full of regret?

First up, if you make a mistake, admit to it. Take back control by taking personal responsibility for your actions. Don’t blame others, because you don’t really pass them responsibility, you just pass them power. So own up and look for the learning. Acknowledge a mistake has been made – that’s the first step to moving beyond regret.

Your words or actions may have cause harm or offense, so don’t be slow to apologize. Make sure you are apologizing for the right reasons though. If you feel an apology will rekindle old pain or resentment, then leave well alone. Apologize to someone to help them move on, not to make you feel better. If you find yourself in the position where you feel that an old wrong can’t be righted, then find a way to forgive yourself and move on. Maybe you could try writing a letter, setting out how you feel. Write it all down, but don’t post it. Articulating how you feel in this way can help you to make the shift to self-forgiveness.

What about the things you regret not doing? It’s never too late to change your life. Maybe you regret a relationship breakdown, not taking a holiday, not going to college. There are always options. Maybe you can rekindle the romance, or take the lessons learnt into a new relationship. Or maybe you can find out more about the holiday you wanted to take. You could rent movies, or buy guide books to find out more about the country you missed the visit to. And it’s never to late to go to college – check out evening classes if that is the ony time you have available. But remember, there are new opportunities waiting for you every day – so don’t keep looking back – you might miss them. NLP techniques can help you to set achievable goals and give you the skills you need to achieve whatever you want.

Lastly be thankful for what you have and for what you are. Every mistake has taught you something, so make sure you take the learning and be grateful. Often our most valuable lessons come from mistakes. Pay attention though – if you keep making the same mistake over and over, you are not learning the lessons! The only way to break the cycle is by taking action and adapting your behaviour.

So there is it. Embrace your mistakes and know that life is simply teaching you a lesson. Forgive yourself and others and enjoy your life. As Edith Piaf said “je ne regrette rien”.

Are you living the life you deserve with no regrets? Why not find out how NLP techniques can help you to take control of your life and banish your regrets forever.

Why not have a look at our new bestseller You Can Achieve Anything. Available now on Amazon Kindle.

Audrey Finch is CEO of Better Life 4u. Committed to helping you break through the barriers to achieve success.

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