Helping those people who want to do better, be better and accomplish more.
By C. Om
I have good news for you!
The only difference between you being as happy as you ever possibly could, and how you are right now, is how you are feeling.
Sounds a bit obvious, huh? Well it is common sense. But you know what they say; “Common sense is not common.” Most people never give this any thought what-so-ever. [Read more...]
By Ingrid Cliff
Do you want to be happy in your life? Not the constant blissed out happiness of flower children, but genuine happiness on a day to day basis. Happiness is only a thought away. What do I mean by that? One of the key indicators of how happy you feel is how optimistic you are and one of the causes of optimism is how you talk to yourself. In a previous issue, we talked about your internal guidance system and touched on self talk. This month I would like to explore this concept a bit further.
When you make a mistake – do you beat up on yourself? Do you call yourself names like “stupid”, “failure” or “idiot”. Do you “should” all over yourself, “I should be doing this” or “I shouldn’t be doing that”. When we were born, we did not have these negative critics in our head. As we grew, we adopted them into ourselves from our parents, teachers and other kids.
Most of us learnt the art of criticism really well – after all we didn’t want to get above ourselves did we? In fact many of us learnt the lessons so well, that we outdid the originators of the criticism. Whatever they said, we thought it twice as strong and twice as fast. Sort of like if mum was going to send us to our room for 5 minutes time out for something we had done, however we had already sent ourselves to our rooms and decided to lock ourselves in for a whole year, not eat for a week and remove the TV for good.
So what can you do about it? Martin Seligman in his groundbreaking book “Learned Optimism” gives some simple tools to turn around your thoughts.
1. Listen to your self-talk. When do you do it most? What do you say to yourself? Would you speak to your small children the same way that you talk to yourself? Are your “shoulds” realistic measures of you or are they setting unrealistic benchmarks for your behaviour?
2. Think about some times when your behaviour contradicted the self talk (eg: if you think you are a bad mum, then find some examples of when you were a good mum).
3. Find some different explanations for the situation or event. This is not about justification, it is about finding different possibilities. (eg: It could be that the person that yelled at you for something you did was having a bad day and their anger really had nothing to do with you)
4. Distract yourself from going over and over the bad thoughts. Tie your worries onto a worry tree or a into a worry basket and come back to them later if you really have to. Find other “lighter” thoughts to think about. Listen to music, do some exercise – anything to interrupt the flow of negative thoughts.
5. Question your underlying beliefs (eg: I must be liked by everyone I meet, I must be completely competant and make no mistakes ever if I am worthwhile, it is easier to put off something unpleasant than deal with it). Underlying beliefs can be hard to shift, but they are not impossible.
So if you really want to be happy in your life, listen to your self talk and take some action.
In the words of Groucho Marx:
Each morning when I open my eyes I say to myself:
‘I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today. I can choose which it shall be.
Yesterday is dead, tomorrow hasn’t arrived yet. I have just one day, today, and I’m going to be happy in it.”
Julius “Groucho” Marx, 1890-1977
Ingrid Cliff is a [http://www.heartharmony.com.au]Brisbane freelance writer and the Chief Word Wizard of Heart Harmony – her writing services studio that helps put your business into words. Ingrid writes a free weekly newsletter packed full of small business tips to help both you and your business grow [http://www.heartharmony.com.au/index.html]www.heartharmony.com.au.
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Ingrid_Cliff http://EzineArticles.com/?Happiness-Is-Only-A-Thought-Away&id=1438140
By Wendy St. Germain http://ezinearticles.com/?expert=Wendy_St._Germain
Our purpose in life is to be happy. That’s why we are here. We spend much of our lives pursuing what we believe will make us happy, but what we fail to realize is that happiness is a feeling and just thinking about what makes you happy will give you that feeling. You don’t need any thing to make you feel happy, you only need the thought and you will experience the happiness.
If you want a new job, imagine being in the position you want and earning the salary you desire; by doing so, you already have the feeling of happiness even before you get the job. Of course, you still want to get the job, since you can’t go shopping with your feelings, but the end result is already yours. You have already created the job, in your mind, by having the feeling. All you must do is to allow it to materialize and take the steps you feel are necessary. You might want to brush up on your skills so when your interview comes around you are more qualified and prepared.
The sense of accomplishment, opportunity to work at something you love and the increased income, which you associate with your new job, are created by thoughts. Thoughts are real and will attract that situation, or a similar one, into your life. On the other hand, since you already have the happy feeling, you might decide you like your current job. Either way you can’t lose since, no matter what the outcome, you’re already happy.
To quote Wallace Wattles from The Science of Getting Rich, Man must pass from the competitive to the creative mind; he must form a clear mental picture of the things he wants, and hold this picture in his thoughts with the fixed PURPOSE to get what he wants, and the unwavering FAITH that he does get what he wants, closing his mind against all that may tend to shake his purpose, dim his vision, or quench his faith.
We were all born happy. As small children we played, laughed and giggled throughout the day. We didn’t need anyone to tell us what we desired; in fact, we were willing to throw tantrums in order to get our way. We ate what we wanted and did as we pleased; resisting, without hesitation, anything we didn’t like. At that young age, when we became unhappy, we protested wholeheartedly by crying, kicking, screaming or trying to run away. Happiness was so essential to us then, we were willing to put 100 percent of our energy into anything that would help us attain and preserve our happy state. If we wanted a toy and it was given to us, we were delighted and totally content. If our plaything was taken from us, it became an overwhelming tragedy.
As we got older, we learned to accept that which didn’t make us happy–setting aside what we really desired. In addition, we learned that there are things we must do whether we liked it or not; that’s just the way life is. That was the lie we chose to believe, but it’s not the way life is supposed to be. You don’t have to accept or settle for anything. All you have to do is to have the intention to be happy, remember how it feels to be happy, and decide that you are happy.
Wendy is the author of “Do You Want to Be Happy NOW?
Sign up for Happy Newsletters at: http://www.HappyAwareness.com
Copyright 2008 Wendy St. Germain.
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Wendy_St._Germain http://EzineArticles.com/?Happiness—Being-Happy-is-a-Choice&id=1230520
Yesterday I bought an MP3 player – a cute little red one with 4 Gigabytes of memory. I bought it because I’m going whale watching and I wanted something to listen to on the trip. This was a big step for me, because I had decided I just couldn’t master one more electronic step up. I remember when we had big vinyl records, then 331/3, then tapes, then cassette tapes, eight tracks, CDs and now these little cuties. My son has one hanging out of his ears most of the time and it looked quite complex. These days, the simpler the better. But I took that leap and now I’m the maybe not-so-proud-owner of a new gadget to figure out.
After a few hours of reading the directions over and over, installing software on my computer, and struggling to get my computer and my player to take with each other, I finally got some of my own music on it. I put the ear plugs in, turned it on and listened to some Enya. Oh, that was lovely. So I found some Andrea Boccelli, and then some Motzart and a little bit lf Lang Lang. The sound is wonderful – better than surround sound – and the music that I chose was happy and uplifting. Why didn’t I get this sooner? [Read more...]
ByCraig Harper http://ezinearticles.com/?expert=Craig_Harper
Years ago when I was young(er) and dumb(er) I went to a Deepak Chopra seminar.
Someone had dragged me along to hear this bloke who, apparently, was some kind of doctor, philosopher, teacher, mystic and guru.
I’d never heard of him.
Ignorant Aussie. [Read more...]
ByLarry Haberhttp://ezinearticles.com/?expert=Larry_Haber
Are you feeling a little under the weather?
Is the Doctor constantly urging you to make diet and life-style change?
You don’t know what it means to enjoy the ‘pink of health’?
Good health in medical terms is a physical state when all the body organs are in proper functioning condition.
But how close to this ideal are we? You are only as healthy as you believe yourself to be. Your mind does hold sway over your body and if the mind is well, the body will flourish with health. The opposite is also true: the more you brood over your state, the worse you are likely to feel. Why? [Read more...]
Daily Quote for Thursday, May 17, 2012 - - "Whoever said you can't buy happiness forgot little puppies." - Gene Hill
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By Irene Conlan - We had a "garage sale" yesterday. Some people call them "yard sales." We sold neither a garage nor a yard. We don't even have a garage. In some parts of the country they are "Tag sales" and I doubt if tags are sold. But you know what I'm talking about. We put out the … [Read More...]
By Irene Conlan - You've done everything you know to do. You've lost that extra 30 pounds that kept you from your "perfect size." You spent your last bit of savings getting a makeover - new hairdo/haircut, new wardrobe, ripped abs, teeth whitened. You look good and you know you look good. … [Read More...]