By Nacie Carson -

You have a unique potential that no one else in the world shares.  The person you have the ability to be and the life you have the possibility to lead are completely original to you.  Your unique potential makes you an integral element in the fabric of the human story, and whether you are aware of it or not, you have a role to fulfill in shaping the future, even if it is just in microscopic ways.

Yet in our modern world of Blackberry phones, 24/7 news channels, email, IMs, and global communication, our personal understanding of unique potential becomes clouded by one of the most horrible feelings known to man: the should mentality.

The should mentality is that little voice we all have in the back of our minds that tells us what we should be doing based on what we think is expected of us.  When you graduate college you should get a 9-5 job.  You should get married and live in the suburbs with 2.5 kids.  You should aspire to a corner office and gold watch when you retire.

At first, following the voice of the should mentality feels good – we typically receive a lot of praise from those around us who also believe in what people should do with themselves.  Our parents, bosses, coworkers, romantic partners, and even friends are all there to cheer us on and congratulate us when we achieve those milestones in life we should want: promotion, job, house, car, children, vacation home, golden retriever.

However, after some time – it can be hours, weeks, years, or just minutes – the shiny feelings of living a should  life start to wear off, and we are left struggling with one horrifying question:

If I am doing everything I should be doing, then why does it feel so wrong?

How many of you have stopped one day and felt like unhappiness and dissatisfaction hit you like a ton of bricks?  Like you had done everything right but were still so unconditionally and unfairly unhappy?  How does this happen, and why?

Over the past several years, I have spent a lot of time with clients who have felt exactly this way.  Like the rug was pulled out from under them, and like they suddenly felt purposeless and inconsequential.  And almost every time the cause was the same: these people were unaware of their unique potential.
Your unique potential is a niche in the structure of the world that only you can fill.  One of my favorite ways to imagine it is like the very simple child’s game of fitting basic shape cut-outs into the right space on a wooden board.  The triangle is the only shape that can fit into the triangle shaped hole, the circle is the only shape that can fit into the circular hole, etc.

Our unique potential is like that: a specific and original shape that is the only thing that can fit into an “us”-shaped hole in life.

So if we all have a unique potential that is ours and ours alone, then why these feelings of incompleteness and unhappiness? If we all have a unique potential then how does the should mentality ever really affect us?

While you are born with your own unique potential already a part of you, you are not born with the guarantee you will achieve it – that is something you must consciously work toward on your own.  Most of us find it easy to begin the process of understanding our unique potential as children, and then as we grow and develop societal pressures and the challenges of the should mentality conflict with our desire to achieve our unique potential.  After all, it is uncomfortable to be different, to be unique, from our peers. The result is people one day realize that while they have achieved significant goals on the should track, they have no understanding of their own unique potential or their purpose in the world.

The good news – no, the wonderful news – is that while you may feel like you have no sense of specific purpose in this world and have no idea what your unique potential might be, it is never too late to find out.

Let me say it one more time: it is never too late to find out.

The great journey of life is this process of understanding our unique potential, and it is only over when our hearts stop beating.  Every minute you have here is a chance to find out what your purpose is and how you can start to achieve it every day.  It will take time, effort, and some struggle, but when you are on the path to achieving your unique potential you will feel it in the very core of you.

Don’t spend one more moment of your life making choices you think you should be making and start listening to what your inner most self is advising you to choose.  By making the commitment to consciously work toward fulfilling your unique potential today, you are turning a corner to a better, more fulfilled life tomorrow.

Here’s to your unique potential – here’s to your Uncommon Life!

Nacie Carson is a personal development specialist and published author.  She is the founder of The Life Uncommon, an online community dedicated to helping individuals live authentic, productive, and successful lives.  http:www.thelifeuncommon.net

I want to thank Nacie Carson for this great article. This week we exchanged articles and her outstanding article on potential is here. Her web site - http:www.thelifeuncommon.net – is a “must visit.”