By Nelson Berry -
Betrayal is one of the uglier things in life, but sometimes it cannot be helped. Have you ever been betrayed by someone? It could be some acquaintance you wouldn’t mind losing in your life, but it could also be a close family member, a best friend, or a partner. Whether they did it intentionally or not, the feeling of betrayal can often strike us hard and deep, and sometimes may have lasting effects when not dealt with properly.
After the shock wears off, a person who has been betrayed may easily feel weak and vulnerable. It is often a make or break period in one’s life: what you do next, how you get out of that situation and rise above the betrayal, can have a long-term effect on your life. Some people don’t really recover from a betrayal. They think they have, but from the moment they were betrayed, they never really learn to trust again.
So what should you do after you’ve been betrayed? How can you overcome the betrayal without destroying your ability to trust people again? Here are some thoughts to ponder on.
1. Allow yourself to grieve. Give yourself time to grieve over the situation. In a betrayal, no matter how big or small, pain, sadness, and anger are always parts of the picture. Sometimes, they may even strike all at once. You need to let yourself freely feel those emotions so you will fully realize what happened. This is better than being in denial and letting yourself get betrayed all over again. Give yourself some time to lose your head for a while, then get back to business.
2. Choose what to focus on. After the ugly emotions rear their ugly heads and slink away, it’s time to tackle things with a rational head again. Instead of focusing on negative thoughts that dwell on anger, bitterness, regret, and revenge, it is your choice to look away and instead focus on how to survive from the ordeal.
You can focus on:
� The future
� Your family
� Your remaining friends
� Your interests and hobbies
� Your skills
� Your career
And most importantly, you can focus on yourself.
3. Choose what to believe. You also have the right to choose what to believe. It is normal for people to feel degraded when they get betrayed. This feeling often puts up a two-storey house inside your subconscious and continues to reside there for years. Even as you get that multi-million contract or get a seven-digit salary, even as you reach your highest goals, the feeling of not being loved or respected enough to be betrayed can still haunt you from time to time. You doubt your worth all the time, and you find yourself either seeking for affirmations constantly or never trusting anyone again.
Do not let yourself get drowned in all that negative self-perception. You have a choice: do you really believe that you are worthless or would you rather believe that the betrayal happened for your own good? Perhaps the person who betrayed you wasn’t really playing a helpful role in your life. Maybe he or she was holding you back.
Create your own beliefs, and make sure your mind cooperates with you by sending these beliefs straight to your subconscious mind. You can do this with simple routines involving subliminal music and subliminal videos that can deliver messages straight to your subconscious.