By B R Karan –
Like father, like son – this is a very common saying. But, in reality, it falls short of describing the actual nature of the relationship shared by these two primary family members. The bond between father and son is very crucial. It covers the three basic tenets of friendship, love and discipline. This is one relation which can be exceedingly rewarding and works well. But most people, instead of realizing this, do not put in the requisite amount of effort to maintain the relationship smoothly. This lack of effort can commonly be attributed to the difference in perspectives.
In order to strengthen this bond, it is necessary to take into account both the father’s and the son’s stance on the matter. But, the role of the mother in the relationship also cannot be discounted. She is the single most important person in both their lives and provides the necessary balance to the relationship. It would have never been possible without her to resolve all doubts and disputes between these two hot-blooded males.
According to the father’s point-of-view, a son needs to accept the responsibility to provide him with care and affection. However, he is unable to express his feelings easily. So, in order to nurture this special bond between kinsmen, there are certain points which every father should keep in mind in order to foster a strong father-son relationship.
It is necessary to offer mutual support in times of trouble. This activity also helps build up a sense of camaraderie between these two individuals. Also, fathers need to learn not to dwell on their sons’ faults. They should accept them and work with their children to overcome the faults to improve the relation further and avoid mistakes later. Allowances should be made but till a certain extent. Finally, it is not acceptable for a father to follow his dreams at the cost of sacrificing his son’s personal aspirations. This will only serve to fuel more hostility between the two.
Sons also are not without their share of faults. Over the course of time, they tend to lose respect for their fathers and forget to treat them as individuals with feelings. Maturity is required when handling such cases. They need to realize that aged people crave for love and care. They require family support and nothing brings them more joy than spending time with their grandchildren. Just as they tended to their sons in childhood, they also expect the same treatment from their sons in old age.
Thus, it is very important to maintain the shared trust between a father and son. As the son grows up and bears the role of the nurturer of the family, it is his turn to reciprocate for his father the same affection and care that he was shown when he was a child.
A father is the person who provides his son’s life with proper structure, balance, discipline and, most importantly, love. He aspires to be the perfect role model. Honesty and respect are the main components needed to keep this relationship strong as they both grow older and the roles of the nurturer and nurtured are reversed with time.