Cold Cases Are Toxic
As we progress through life experiences both positive and negative we collect data. We call the collected data memories. Memories are powerful because they create a connectedness between people, places, and things. This can be good in the positive meaning memories have the ability to create and reinforce bonds. These bonds can build quality relationships of all kinds. Conversely, when memories become toxic then they work in the reverse. They can damage and in some cases destroy quality relationships of all kinds.
The Trauma Epidemic
Trauma is quickly becoming an epidemic in our society because so many people are suffering from broken hearts and damaged souls. Meanwhile, life continues on and hurts continue to pile up in the souls of individuals. As we look into society we see people from all walks of life that are facing issues in their soul.
A cold case is a criminal case that is open for an extended period of time. This case has never been solved and has become cold. Until new evidence comes in, the case remains open and unsolved. I use this example because it is the same way with individuals who are recovering from trauma. As we go through life all the experiences that we had that we never resolved remain an open case unsolved in our soul. As these cases begin to build up in the soul it begins a shift in the person mental health. Individuals with a lot of cold cases or life experiences that are unresolved begin to change due to the build-up of issues in their soul. This is one of the contributory factors when individuals eventually snap.
What have you allowed to build up on the inside of you emotionally? What unresolved issues have created an adjustment in the way you interact with the people around you?
Through environments like our homes, workplace, places of worship, and the public square we are all connected. We are all connected to people who can be potentially impacted by something unresolved in us.
This is how hurt people eventually hurt other people. Most people don’t intentionally attempt to create hurt in the lives of others. However, when we have unresolved issues in our soul we negatively impact the lives of others around us.
I cannot emphasize enough the value of processing successfully through our personal recovery. When we allow life experiences to build up within us without any resolution it can cause individuals to become cold emotionally. This can potentially lead to isolation from relationships that matter most to us.
There two forms of isolation that individuals with too many cold cases can experience. Social isolation is the absence of social relationships for an extended period. Emotional isolation happens when you have been in social isolation for too long.
The absence of emotional relationships for an extended period of time can trigger negative feelings and thoughts. My point is that extended isolation can lead to deeper pits of depression, loneliness, and other mental health concerns.
Extended isolation does not make things better; on the contrary, things become worse. The recovery process will only work when we cooperate and participate. It does not work when you isolate.
About the Author
Earlie James Jr. is an Author, Certified Leadership Coach, Teacher, Trainer, Speaker, Pastor and Recovery Coach. His mission is to help individuals understand who they are and why they are here. To help them develop competencies that will enable them to release their voice, overcome life traumas, find their creative genius, and apprehend the life they were meant to live.
Earlie recently published Stuck: The Road to Experiencing a Successful Recovery, a book to help people regain the drive to move forward after one of life’s traumas devastates the way they live their lives. It’s available on Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07DQRGRYF
To learn more about him and his work, visit http://earliejames.com.