Things Your Parents Taught You That Are Wrong—A Shift In Perspective on Life Lessons Learned
In the beginning, you looked up to your parents like the superheroes that they were and are. We took their word as weight in gold. Why wouldn’t we? They were the apple of our eyes, and we wanted to be just like them. Emulate they in every way, shape or form. The only drawback of this was that we might have picked up some bad habits, beliefs or views of the world that don’t exactly support us as adults. I am not saying that they were wrong in teaching us these things. Most all parents truly want the best for their children. This doesn’t mean that we have to keep holding on to these non-supportive programs and not love our parents just as much. Our beliefs can change with life lessons learned.
But certain ones are sabotaging our growth and success in life and must be changed before it’s too late. Below I bring you 3 things your parents taught you that were wrong . Enjoy my friends.
Number 1— “If you don’t have nothing nice to say, don’t say it at all.”
This is hogwash! Sorry, I watched Harry Potter last night and they said that a lot 😉
Honestly, this keeps kids from expressing their opinions and expressing how they feel. Things that are not nice are not necessarily something that shouldn’t be said. If it is coming from a good place and you want to help the other person by saying something “not nice”, then it should be said.
This also leads to toxic emotions and feelings being suppressed and wreaking havoc emotionally later on down the line.
We should instead teach our children to express how they feel but without malicious intent.
This way we encourage kids that they have a voice and they don’t have to be quiet. They can empower themselves by explaining themselves in a constructive manner.
They will not grow up to be pushovers. In order to be a good communicator, you need to communicate everything you are feeling. Plus people respect a straight shooter.
You don’t want to simply tell a person all they want to hear. You will never develop trust or build an authentic relationship with someone, or the world at larger if only say nice things.
Instead, when you have something nice to say, emphasize the niceness and bring warmth to it so the person feels your compassion in your approach.
If you have something bad to say, say it in a way that isn’t an attack but truly your opinion. Expressing how you are feeling isn’t a personal attack.
Number 2—Save For a Rainy Day
This is simply making your mind to seek rainy days.
“What we resist, persists.” – Carl Jung
We save and save and save only living in fear of something negative happening.
Instead, we need to be taught to save money to build a better life. Diversify our money. Invest our money. Make our money work for us. Not just a nest egg we need to rely on if life gets tough.
It is too risky to put all of our eggs in one basket. Instead let’s encourage our young bucks to see all the possibilities money has to work for us to create a future we can thrive in, not one we are scared to get to unless we save enough money and avoid enough rainy days.
We need to change the perspective we imprint on our children about money. To not save in a fear-based mentality, but save and invest coming from a place of abundance.
Which one would you rather operate from?
Number 3—Such Big Emphasis On A Report Card
When it comes down to it, grades should not be our source of belief on how smart or well our child is doing. The school system caters to a certain type of learning style which very few children can actually learn well through.
When kids get bad grades or answer questions wrong, they feel like failures. This is very early on in one’s life where they are so susceptible to their environment. This can do a lot of damage to their psychological health.
This can limit risk-taking because of the fear of being wrong, or inadequate. Which risk-taking is a massively useful tool in life we need to develop early on to use in the real world. If we aren’t risking big, we aren’t going to get big rewards.
Instead, we need to encourage our children that grades aren’t everything. They are not a reflection of who we are or how smart we are.
Instead, they are just that, a letter. Instead, we want to promote them to focus on their creative abilities and subjects that make them the happiest.
When they find those subjects, then we encourage them to think about how they can create a life around those topics that evoke the most happiness from them. Because life is so short and happiness matters, not getting straight A’s.
I am not saying to encourage our children to not care in school. Instead not place their value so heavily on a report card.
So again, this is just my two cents! These are 3 things that I had personal experience with and would like to do differently with my children! What about you and your parents? What about your life lessons learned?
I would love to hear what you think as well as if you have any great things to add for shifting our perspective on life advice for our little ones 🙂
Let’s talk in the comment section below!
About the Author
Chris is a personal trainer and natural bodybuilder by trade, mediation advocate, but his first love is personal development. He is extremely passionate about both subjects and blogs about them at personaldevelopfit.com! You might enjoy another article on 333 Healthy Habits at http://personaldevelopfit.com/